Koh Samui, Thailand

A much needed and appreciated break. The last time I took leave was Nov last year when I went home for Thanksgiving. This time, instead of going to Dallas, I met Julie in Thailand.

My flight out of Kabul was like any other. Walked about a quarter mile from the parking area to the terminal, past vendors, taxi drivers, and other less-fortunate travelers. Between the time I entered the main gate and boarded the plane, I had my bags x-rayed twice, search twice, and I was patted down five times. The flight crew was Turkish, I think. The in-flight meal was naan, fruit, yogurt, and an unidentifiable meat product. Most Americans fly first to Dubai for connecting flights. Two other MPRI employees were on my flight, Dennis & Melisa.

DUBAI

Dennis was meeting his fiancée-to-be in for a week-long vacation in Dubai. Melisa was meeting a friend in, coincidentally, Bangkok. My flight out the next morning was very early so I didn’t bother with a hotel room. We all went out and had a wonderful steak dinner and a few cocktails, then I went to the airport to wait for my flight.

My flight to Doha, Qatar, then on the Bangkok was uneventful. Upon arriving in Bangkok I had a few hours to kill until Julie’s flight arrived, so I ate, shopped, and read Lucifer’s Hammer by Larry Niven and Jerry Pournelle—light vacation reading about TEOTWAWKI (The End Of The World As We Know It). Somehow we missed each other at the airport so I took a taxi to the hotel and there she was in the lobby!

BANGKOK

The Lebua at State Tower is magnificent. We had an incredible suite on the 54th floor. Two bedrooms, full kitchen, two living areas, three balconies. We emptied the mini-bar of its alcoholic beverages on the balcony while enjoying the view and each other’s company.

The next morning we hit the road to see Bangkok. Walking out of the hotel and down the street, there were vendors everywhere. I had to try something local, so I bought a couple of things cooked wrapped in leaves. Upon opening them, I was delighted to find what I can only describe as a hot, sweet banana. We didn’t really have a plan, so I hailed a tuk-tuk. A tuk-tuk is a sort a hybrid between a motorcycle and a rickshaw. Here’s what one looked like. I asked the driver to take us to a restaurant for an authentic Thai lunch. He dropped us off at a nice little place with live fish in aquariums out front where we picked out our food. We had spicy Tom Yam soup, prawns, fried rice, and a few Singha beers.

Then we found another tuk-tuk driver who offered to show us the city for a reasonable fee. I think it was about US $12. We saw several Buddha temples and a few tailor/jewelry shops that he insisted we visit. Note: tuk-tuk drivers get coupons for free gas when they take you to certain establishments.

Later we went to a posh bar at the top of Lebua at State Towers, had a few more Singhas, and I tricked Julie into eating an olive.

KOH SAMUI DAY 1

Then it was time to start our trek to Koh Samui, which is an island in the Gulf of Thailand. There’s a couple of ways to get from Bangkok to Koh Samui. Most people take the one-hour flight. I thought it would be romantic to take a sleeper train to Surat Thani (about eleven hours), then a short ferry ride to Koh Samui. Boy was I wrong. While the train ride was adventurous, it was anything but romantic. The train station was neat though, at one point we saw an officer in uniform talking with a woman in a dress sitting on a bench, and it was reminiscent of old WWII movies. But we didn’t get a sleeper car like I envisioned. The beds were our seats, folded out bunk-bed style. I was too short for my top bunk. I crawled out early the next morning to find Julie sitting up in her bunk like a kid in her sheet fort on her bed. We arrived in Surat Thani, then about two hours on a bus to the ferry, then about three hours on the ferry in the rain to Koh Samui. We decided on the return trip we’d fly instead.

Of note was some of the Buddhist ornaments. Like Julie & I who both wear crosses depicting our Christian beliefs, Buddhists wear things too. Some of them are quite large and encased in clear plastic like little terrariums. Finally we asked someone who said they were monks and/or temples and meant to bring good luck.

We arrived at Bill Resort (I know, but it’s Bill Resort not Bill’s Resort) and we amazed by our beachfront bungalow. The edge of our deck was literally only a few yards from the surf. The pool & restaurant was just around the corner. Except for a steep walk from/to the reception area, it was perfect. We immediately broke into the mini-bar and I had the Singhas while Julie enjoyed the Thai red wine which was chilled and sweet like Sangria.

KOH SAMUI DAY 2

We had breakfast at the resort restaurant, served by a waitress we nicknamed Button because we agreed she was “as cute as a button.” Then after relaxing a while on our deck watching the waves and beach traffic, we adventured into town. Almost dehydrated from the 100 ft. walk, we stopped at the first available patio bar for some liquid refreshment—Singha. We were joined by Maria the cat as we watched young men spar in the open-air Muay Thai boxing ring across the street. We later made out way down the street, patronizing each patio bar along the way, and were adopted by a beach dog we named Clyde who looked remarkably like Julie’s dog Sampson and who followed us the rest of the day.

At one bar we decided to deviate from Singha and ordered Bloody Marys. They were horrible. We told the server (Russian, I think) so and he admitted he didn’t know how to make them but he would go ask his friend. He immediately hopped on the back of a scooter and disappeared. Some time later he returned and apologized because he couldn’t find Worcester anywhere on the island.

KOH SAMUI DAY 3

The third day was our jungle safari. We were picked up at he hotel and first went to see Grandfather and Grandmother rocks, which are well-known natural rock formations that look remarkably like male & female genitalia. Then we went to an animal park where Julie held a baby otter and several birds, I bottle-fed two tiger cubs, we saw an elephant show, and we went for a ride on an elephant. Our next stop was a beautiful waterfall and quick swim. Then to the top of a mountain where we had a magnificent view of the island, and lunch at a restaurant with an equally impressive view. Lastly, we went to see the Giant Buddha, which was on the other side of the island. We were traveling in the back of a small pickup with other tourists, including two young women who we think were French, and three guys who turned out to be the first Emirates I’ve ever met despite my many trips through Dubai. There was also one frumpy old lady who was sight-seeing by herself.

KOH SAMUI DAY 4

This was the relaxing day. We went to Tamarind Springs Spa for five hours of blissful relaxation. First one and a half hours by ourselves in a steam room built into the rocks and a cool water pool right next to it. Then a two and a half hour massage in a comfortable pavilion surrounded by jungle. We could hear rainfall and jungle birds while skillful masseuses treated us to a traditional Thai massage.

That night we went to Rick’s Resort for a delightful dinner of tempura shrimp and prawns in white wine sauce with a Chilean Corinto Merlot. There was a cabaret show with transvestites lip-synching and dancing to show tunes. Later we retreated to our bungalow where we relaxed on the deck and I enjoyed a Nicaraguan Vigilante cigar while we watched fireworks light up the shrimp boats.

KOH SAMUI DAY 5

We laid on the beach, slept, ate, relaxed.

KOH SAMUI DAY 6

Fishing/snorkeling tour. The van picked us up and took us to the pier where we boarded our boat. We went out near some small islands nearby and fished with hand lines over the side of the boat. I caught a small grouper. Later Julie had a bite. She said “It feels big!” and was having trouble bringing it in so I reached over to help her, thinking she must be hung up on a rock. Nope, it was a big one! Together we pulled it in and then let the deck hands take over to net it (with a laundry basket) and bring it aboard. Everyone cheered when it was in the boat and took pics. I wish I could say what kind it was but I’ve never seen anything like it and couldn’t understand what the Thai deck hand said, but it was shaped like a sunfish only larger. It was probably 15 inches long, about 10 inched tall, and I guess it weighed 12 lbs.

After fishing in the morning, we went to a small island where the crew prepared our catch and we had a picnic. Julie’s fish fed not only the other tourists on our boat (three from China and two from Hong Kong), but also another boat that didn’t have any fish.

Then we went to another area where there were some coral reefs and got out of the boat to snorkel. It was beautiful. There were hundreds of fish who weren’t shy. At times we’d be surrounded by these little fish that would swim right up to us and even brush against us.

We were supposed to fly back to Bangkok the next day for two more nights in Bangkok. The fishing was great, but I told Julie it wasn’t exactly what I had in mind—I was thinking about more fishing, with poles, in boat in which we could stand, with beer. We both loved Koh Samui so much we decided to extend another day. So…

KOH SAMUI DAY 7

This time we took another fishing tour. A bigger boat, with fishing poles, standing room, and Singha beer. We fished all morning then broke for onboard lunch when the crew cooked some of our catch. The captain asked if we wanted to snorkel in the afternoon or keep fishing. Us tourists (Julie & me; a couple from China; a couple from Germany; two Asian teens; and a guy who we think was English) voted to continue fishing. I caught a few fish and a lot of coral, Julie caught a few fish plus one calamari.

That night we went to a highly rated restaurant called the Cliff. We had a delicious dinner, appetizers, soup, wine, entrée, desert, after-dinner drinks all for under US $200.

KOH SAMUI DAY 8

Checked out of the resort and had time for a little shopping before our flight. We bought some souvenirs and I bought a ring for Julie. The airport in Koh Samui was surprisingly beautiful, like you might expect an island paradise airport should be. Flight to Bangkok, taxi to the Royal Orchid Hotel where our room on the seventeenth floor had a splendid view of the river, but no balcony. We had dinner in the hotel’s Thai restaurant. One last glorious taste of spicy Tom Yam soup; a delightful appetizer that you build yourself from leaves, scallion, peanuts, dried shrimp, something crunchy, and topped with a spicy sauce; prawns in white wine sauce, and a Chilean Cabernet.

BANGKOK

Up early and to the airport. A quick kiss goodbye and then Julie made a mad dash to her gate while I checked in for my flight. Julie’s flight included a short layover in Tokyo while mine included a long layover in the tiny airport in Doha, Qatar.

DUBAI

I finally landed in Dubai where I had almost twenty hours to kill. I went to the Gardens mall, shopped for a new bag since mine was falling apart, had some grape leaves and hummus at the food court, and watched the Iron Man movie. I didn’t realize Iron Man took place in Afghanistan and the bad guys were Arab. It was interesting to watch a movie in the United Arab Emirates, in English with Arab subtitles—except when the bad guys were speaking. Weird.

Found a cheap hotel for the night where apparently the clientele was mostly Pakistani workers. Went to the dingy hotel bar for a nightcap and saw an Arab-looking woman get irate at something a man said to her, expecting to see an instant beheading but someone rushed the guy out before that could happen. Went to bed, woke up the next morning for my flight back to Kabul. As usual, the taxi driver was surprised to hear I wanted Terminal 2. Most westerners fly in and out of Terminal 1. Terminal 2 is reserved for shitty third-world countries. I guess it doesn’t need to be said which terminal flies to Afghanistan.

KABUL

Arrived in Kabul and had to wait on the tarmac while some Japanese delegation was ceremoniously greeted, then through customs, searched, x-rayed, and frisked. Back the grey quarter mile past security guards with AK-47s, beggars, vendors, and taxi drivers to the parking area where my driver Sherin was waiting for me with my body armor like a puppy dog. Home sweet home.

Click here for our pics (over 400 of them). Enjoy!

Out.

Julie added her observations to mine:

Flight Day: My flights: Tokyo—flying over looked like flying over Louisiana. Normal houses, not high rises, and rice patties with a fancy golf course in the middle of everything. 22 hour flight to meet you, and an extra 1 1/2 hour delay due to weather. Weather, we later found out, was the cause of the cyclone in Burma.
I get to airport, no Rick, no English, 1:00 AM. I am tired and anxious and have -0- way of communicating with anyone. Found cab-1 hour to hotel. Get there and you had not checked in. I had no idea where you were. No messages either.

Lebua State Tower: Perfect timing...We met in the lobby. They felt sorry for us and had run out of rooms so we got an incredible upgrade to their 2nd best suite! The suite looked like it was straight out of IKEA, quite trendy, complete with crystal chandeliers, separate living/dining room areas, a fully stocked kitchen, 2 bedrooms, front load washer/dryers and 3 balconies. We had to sign a balcony waiver when we checked in since the architecture of the building incorporated balconies in every room. This hotel had been written up in Conde Nast (world renowned travel guide) as one of the top hotels, bar none, in Bangkok. They also have the only restaurant/bar that is literally on the rooftop, overlooking the Chao Phraya River which runs through downtown Bangkok. Weird dress code...women cannot wear open toed shoes. I packed 8 pairs of shoes...all were open toed! The bar is all glass and almost has an infinity feel to it...like you could walk off the ledge and step directly onto the clouds. Very unique.

Bangkok: No fear: stepped out of hotel and immediately grabbed food from a street vendor. They sold the fried honey bananas out of the equivalent of an ice cream cart, and made them as fast as we could buy them. They were wrapped in banana leaves, and were about 1/2 the size of our local bananas. I even enjoyed it!
Buddhist shrines: Very ornate architecture, like nothing else in the city. The actual Buddhas were made out of gold...more specifically gold flakes. We later learned gold flakes were placed on the Buddhas by monks for good fortune. Buddhist monks appear to be quiet, peaceful, bald, and mostly wear orange togas (sarongs?) Temples themselves were made out of gold and gems, and the architecture was quite traditional and different from anything else we saw in the city.
Protocol for the temple: take shoes off, it's ok to take pics inside. Locals burn incense with orchids and dedicate a prayer. People can enter the temple to pray at all hours. We were impressed with this fact. Some people were writing prayers on paper and burning them as an offering to Buddha. There were colorful ribbons and leis, incense and money boxes for donations everywhere at the foot of Buddha. No explanations anywhere in English so we had to assume many traditions.
Jewelry factory: they were actually grinding the stones and carving them into jewelry right in front of us. We heard that the jewelry factories were owned by the govt.

Koh Samui:
Day 2: You could also describe the terrarium as a golden snow globe. Mention that Buddha is in the terrarium, covered in gold, and he brings luck, safety and goodness to those who wear him. Many wore pimped Buddhas.
On the train, we stopped every 1/2 hour or so to pick up other passengers, similar to riding on DART. Vendors would hop on, trying to sell us beer, souvenirs, etc. While on the train, after finally leaving Bangkok, I saw 2 Catholic Church missions surrounded with concertina wire. This was a strange visual. Neither of us had been on a train before and were surprised how the gentle rocking of the train made us sleepy rather early—like around 9 PM! We thought we'd get our own car but shared it with several others. Don't pee unless it's an absolute emergency.
Ferry: Found out beer is only 20 baht, or less than $1, so this stretch of the trip was tolerable. Terrain started looking more like Hawaii with bold mountains jetting out of the water.
Harley riders greeted us when we docked. Many ex-pats going out for a ride.

Bill Resort: We did a great job being very specific with our room request. We mentioned it was out honeymoon and got the royal treatment when we entered our beachfront, bungalow room. The white linen sheets were covered in orchid petals gently placed in the shape of a heart. They also had a fruit basket ornately covered in banana leaves and a wine basket with their local Thai wine. The help was incredibly friendly and accommodating. The trek from our room to the lobby was quite daunting with a hill that would wear out even the most fit hikers. You really had to WANT to get to the lobby if you needed anything. You couldn't just call in for room service, either. The room had no phone! The only English TV channel was Bloomberg. Needless to say there wasn't much TV watching being done. Both of us read. (Yes, Rick even read People magazine with me!) The weather was bad when we arrived so we adapted! We pulled out the IPOD docking station, hung out on the patio, drank, danced, smoked, told lies an stayed up past our bedtime! Near our bungalow, beachfront bars were lined up all down the coastline, so it was no wonder that when tourists walked by they thought we were a bar. We could have sold Singhas and paid for our trip!

Day 3: In town. The side street we stumbled across was the main drag to the cities bars, stores, etc. We couldn't have planned it any better if we tried! It looked like something you might see out of Key West or in some Southern beach town. Very quaint, open-aired architecture. Very laid back. Jamaican music, Abba, country music, you name it. More importantly...very cheap beer. We ordered appetizers once in a while...I fell in love with tempura shrimp and spring rolls. Goes well with Singha.
After touring about 6 establishments, we ventured down a side street that looked slightly different than the main drag. We stopped at one other unique bar: Hot Lips. The reason...we were curious. Their logo was stolen right off of Harley Davidson. It must be cool!
A side note: Local girlie-girls are rampant in Thailand. I think Rick called them buy-me-drinky girls. Old geezers fly to this country by themselves just to get laid by native island girls. They have ample opportunity...local Thai girls prostitute themselves out and it is seen as absolutely no big deal. The exploitation of these girls bothered me quite a bit at first, but nobody else seemed to mind. Eventually, I adapted, but never quite accepted this lifestyle choice. Back to the bar... Hot Lips was such a girly bar. Two hot Thai women greeted us, gave us some Singhas and kept asking Rick to come back later. This didn't bother me at all...but it was interesting that the girls were so brazen and that this is the norm.
Also, you're never really sure whether you're talking to a girl or a boy. Transvestites flourish down here, too. We kept looking for Adams Apples on these two. The he-males/women/men are beautiful and laid back...a perfect combination for anyone looking for 'love'... After we hung out with these 2 for a while, we started to realize that we had stumbled onto a side street that could be best described as the "Zona Rosa"...or red light district. Gays/loose women and alcohol abounded. It was a feast for the eyes! The spirit of the street reminded me of Bourbon Street during Mardi Gras. Great people watching! We ate too much, drank too much, I passed out and Rick partied with the help back at the hotel. This later proved to be a fruitful move. They were at our beck and call the remainder of the trip!

Day 4 Elephant Tour: Story behind Grandfather/Grandmother Rock:
First of all...there is DEEP respect for the elderly in Thailand. Story goes...a grandfather and grandmother were coming to Thailand to raise their family and begin new opportunities. They got caught in a horrible storm and died at sea. Their bodies washed up to shore, and their spirits grew into the boulders/beachside. Their organs became the prominent features to develop in the granite, which was for good luck in fertility.
The rock formations are as close to the real thing as you will ever see. You may even blush or feel a little uneasy staring too long at the rocks.
On the elephant tour, we were lucky enough to also see a monkey act, elephant act and a crocodile act. The crocodile act was the most unique...they hypnotized the crocs and the trainers did such daring stunts as inserting their entire arms and their own heads into the crocs' mouths. They even kissed them on the lips. Trainers were young, 20 yr olds...very daring!
This day was a personal challenge for me on many levels. I was still recovering from a previous surgery I had 2 weeks earlier. I had not regained my sense of core balance. This is only important because I am scared of heights, and we were:
1. Riding on top of HIGH elephants on a trail up in the mountains that looked WAY DOWN onto a creek...straight down a steep hill.
2. Hiking on a trail that was an intermediate level in difficulty up to the waterfall and the magical garden. Nothing was level at all.
3. Driving on narrow roads that had drop offs and I didn't hyperventilate.
We drove to the top of the mountain and saw a view of all the islands we later fished at.
Did I mention it was very humid and about 100 degrees?
On this tour we also saw a mummified monk...some monk who used to be married with a family and after 50 years became a monk/abbot. Converting to a monk is supposed to be a blessing for your family. He saw a premonition of his own death and somehow the family knew to save his body and not bury him. The only thing I know is that Buddhists believe in reincarnation. You come back to Earth at the next level, higher or lower, based off of your behavior in your previous life. Being mummified is evidently a great direction!
We also went to see the Great Buddha. This shrine is enormous! We thought all temples were ancient, but Rick noticed architectural/structural features that would favor towards the modern. Long story short, this temple was built in 1972~! We bought souvenirs here, too. It seemed almost sacrilegious having souvenir shops intertwined with the temple, but it all flowed together just fine!
Note: regarding the Emirates we toured with: they were quite familiar with the USA, more so than any other people we ran into on the trip. One studied in Seattle and had lived in the USA for several years. They actually valued our educational system! They talked about the new Terminal 3 in Dubai airport and since he was an Emirate he got to be one of the first to enter the terminal. 3 Emirate friends on a trip...trouble! They were so friendly! Our first Emirate encounter!
Note regarding the terrain in the mountain: it's as rich and green as you could imagine. There are very thick vines, heavy foliage, ferns, and huge palm trees/coconut trees. Elephants, monkeys and tigers are regional animals here. Any given day or night you heard mynah birds (which are known for mimicking human voices), monkeys, loud chirps and hoots, etc.
I've never seen such a wide variety of beautiful butterflies, either. Families of butterflies were seen that I had never even visualized in pictures before...all with bold vivid colors. No wonder oriental pictures have butterflies in them!
Flowers abound everywhere...hyacinths even float in the water. Colors, smells sounds...you cannot reproduce this back home.

Tamarind Springs: We were not allowed to bring a camera. All I can say is that neither of us had ever been to a spa like this before, and never will again. It, for a lack of better words, is probably a 5-star spa. The theme is "Heaven on Earth". The spa is literally built into the mountainside, and has natural springs to wade in. The natural springs are said to have healing properties. Your experience starts with an outdoor shower with one of those rain-showerheads. Very awesome! Then you wade in the natural springs, which are built into the boulders, complete with a waterfall you can swim in. The spa is built in, too. Just you and nature. They provided us with sarongs and black, fishnet underwear for the massage. Hmmm.
Once your massage begins, you are escorted to an area up the hill in an entire different region of the resort. It's a hike!
Dinner at Rocky's: The Cabaret show focused on music we grew up with. It's interesting to me that nobody was from the USA on this trip, but all of the music was ours. The he-male dancers looked so beautiful...I don't know how they looked so much like girls, but I was intimidated! Represented stars included: Cher, Tina Turner, Saturday Night Fever, Abba, Madonna, Brittany Spears. They even did the Macarena.
The fireworks later: we thought some bar was simply trying to get attention and draw attention to themselves. Fireworks are actually a symbol of good luck for the fisherman. While the fishermen are in their boats at sea, they look towards the coastline and see the fireworks shooting off into the sky. The fireworks are supposed to wish good luck on their catch.

Day of Rest: It rained that night during dinner. Again, we did not know that this bad weather was the future cyclone that hit Burma 3 days later.

Line Fishing Day: This was not a typical boat for salt water fishing. It was a traditional cigar shaped boat with an awning. The captain had concocted some long handle attached to the motor to steer.
We met some Chinese tourists who spoke English, and another couple from Hong King who spoke excellent English. We all exchanged email info and look forward to keeping in touch with them.
Snorkeling was different than in Mexico or Hawaii. You were allowed to stand on the coral. We all got little cuts as a result. Earlier in the day we told our waiter we were going fishing and he gave us a loaf of bread. We had no idea why until we got out there. The fish are so friendly and tame that people feed them bread!
The schools of fish were everywhere! Some fish I recognized: parrot fish, angel and butterfly fish, lion fish, clownfish, damsels, grouper, parrotfish, tangs....absolutely amazing!
Later that night we still had energy and went to the Patio Bar. This night began our Roman Orgy theme which ensued throughout the remainder of the trip. We had wonderful gourmet meals from this day on out.
We arrived early to the restaurant so walked down the road to a little place called "Hip Bar". Finally...English speaking purveyors! The Thai woman who owned the bar, June, and her fiancée were probably in their mid 20's. They love Hip Hop music. She studied hip hop dance for 6 years and wanted to open this bar so others could dance. His sister gave them the $$ to start the place. (Sister was married to an Austrian, they had 2 kids, he died on his birthday in a car wreck and left her lots of money.) June went to New York to take pics of graffiti, since there isn't any on the island. She brought the pics back and her fiancée painted the bar in NY graffiti. We hung out and started talking about real estate. Ends up his sister had a house she was trying to sell. It was from the previous marriage. She wasn't going to sell but she fell in love with a man from England and no longer wanted to keep the place. Price: $25 Million Baht! ($800K USD). This includes 6 acres, 1 main house and 2 cottages complete with a swimming pool. They were a fascinating couple with interesting stories. Then, while we were talking, a little street boy came up to our table and tried to sell us a rose. He was probably about 7 years old at best. Rick bought the entire bouquet from him, and you could see his day was made! He got all giddy, started clapping his hands and making random squealing noises of joy. Once Rick gave him the 18 baht, the little boy, very untraditionally, came up to every person at the table and kissed them on both cheeks and hugged us all. Priceless!
We left and ate at the Patio. It is a part of a beautiful, 5-star resort, and the walk to the restaurant was an experience on its own. It's the kind of resort where if you feel so inclined, you can rent a room with its own swimming pool. We went off of the critic's recommendations: Lobster bisque, mozzarella balls, chicken kebab in red curry sauce, and then a main course of crab stuffed prawn covered in a white wine sauce, shrimp with asparagus and glass noodles with seafood with a side of Thai sauce. Lord, we even had dessert! During the meal, we had the most pleasant Filipino mariachi band trio come sing for us. Before it was all said and done, Rick selected the catchy tune "House of the Rising Sun" for them to sing, (trying to stump the band) and she roped me into singing with them. I sound great with wine! We had a blast! This huge meal was about $100! It would have been a cool $400 here!

Deep Sea Fishing Day: Rick caught a Rockfish within the first hour of the voyage. Whew! He's wanted to fish for months!!!
Weather was a little overcast...thoughts of Gilligan's Island crept in my head. The guide spoke broken English and loved to sing. Calamari, rockfish and grouper were our catch! We didn't starve!
On the boat they gave us complimentary exotic fruits and water. We tried our first Rambutan. It looks like a hairy strawberry! You twist off the skin and a white, plum-like fruit is encased underneath. It's very sweet, and I think it's the fruit used in Thai wine. (Later on we also ate a Dragon Fruit. It is a white fruit with small, edible black seeds. It looks like chocolate chip ice cream...as a fruit! It favors a kiwi but is sweeter.) On the topic of fruit... Rick says he's never had riper bananas in his life, either.

The Cliff: This restaurant was written up in every publication we came across. The chef is from Portugal and has traveled around the world to fuse flavors together. It's worth every bit of the efforts, too!
One big benefit of traveling during off-peak season is that you can virtually walk-in without a wait! We had a patio table as soon as we walked in! Again, we went with the critic's recommendation: appetizer consisted of dumplings stuffed with prawn and topped with lobster/white wine sauce. WOW!!! I had the main dish of Chicken cooked in a Portuguese Piri-Piri sauce. The sauce favors Thai sauce but has some different hotter spices.
Rick had a copper bowl overflowing with mussels drenched in a white wine, almost gravy thickness, sauce. It was pure heaven! All week we had Chilean wines with dinner, and were never disappointed. Rick finally had an opportunity to enjoy some 10 year old port, and I had a Cliffhanger...basically a White Russian with ice cream and chocolate syrup. What a great night. At any given point we had 4 people waiting on us hand and foot!

Last Day: No souvenir shops exist like other tourist places. You actually have to take a tour. We went and Rick bought me a beautiful sapphire/diamond ring in 18kg. I especially like it because they mine sapphires right in Thailand. It's local!
We bought souvenirs... (Ironically no place had t-shirts.) We had a little time to kill before the airport back to Bangkok, so we discovered a Tetco, (aka Wal-Mart).
Rick's suitcase was breaking, so he bought a new one. Then we went outside to a local food stand. Again, we didn't go wrong with the food! Rick had his soup and green curry/potato, I had my glass noodles and we had Singhas! Delicious!
For an island with 40,000 occupants, it struck me as odd that this was the only store of its kind in the island! I guess everyone goes to the marketplaces which abound everywhere!
The airport reminded me of the one on the show "Fantasy Island". I was not alone in taking pictures. Even the restroom had a built-in aquarium.
Rick and I flew together for the first time in several years. Nice. Trains, planes and tuk-tuks! We arrived in Bangkok right during rush hour, and it took forever to reach the Sheraton. This hotel is also on Conde Nast's top hotels to visit.
The lobby favored an elegant museum! It is located on the Chao Phraya River, and the views were almost as beautiful as the State Tower's.
A side note: very trendy room...the TV was a wide screen computer. We need one!
We ate at the hotel's Thai restaurant. You could dine inside in the traditional version, where you take off your shoes and sit at floor level. We opted for the outdoors. It was Friday night and I think a good choice. We saw party boats on the river, all lit up like Christmas trees. The dinner cruisers would float by playing Abba or the Macarena. Quite funny. It reminded us of the Pirate Ship we partied on in Cancun. Arrghhh!
As far as I could tell, we were the only Americans in Koh Samui or Bangkok.
Most tourists were from Australia, Germany, Russia, Holland or somewhere in the Orient. The only time English was spoken was if it was out of necessity. Even the Thai alphabet differs from ours. I think most foreigners felt a little shy speaking English. I felt inept not knowing any language but English. We survived! I didn't realize how close we were to Viet Nam or Malaysia. I also didn't realize how far Thailand was from Japan. There's a large, undiscovered world out there for us to explore.